Corpse Found in Motel?

The following correspondence originally took place upon the Facebook wall of my friend, Jonas A, after I was tagged in the comments section of his post…

Jonas A.: Uhhhhh…wut!?!?

Body Found Under Motel Bed, Police Say It Has Been There At Least 5 Years:
http://empirenews.net/body-found-under-motel-bed-police-claim-its-been-there-5-years/

Amanda H.: Ok wow … I think I will look under the beds when I stay anywhere now…. wtf

Jonas A.: haha….right!!! Make sure to check on the “unusual” smells too…lol!

Starla L.: What makes this difficult to believe is that the smell would have been so bad that an investigation would have taken place and it would not have been five years. If you have ever smelled a dead body, you will understand that.

John M.: I have always wondered why some motel rooms smell nasty. Now I know.

Amanda H.: Hello … How the holy hell does one miss a body? Let alone for 5 years….Boggles the mind…

Starla L.: As I wrote: I do not believe this story. The smell would have given it away in a very short time. In my mind, I am considering this article as a fake news story.

Elena B.: Holy moly

John M.: Empire News is a satirical and entertainment website

Amanda H.: Lol of course it is lol ..it is still creepy enough that I will be looking under beds… 🙂

Deborah B.: Ye rite

Dan S.: Four Rooms – The Misbehavers:

Dan S.: @ Starla Anne Lowry – You could cover a body in quick lime to keep the smell down. Also wrapping in plastic and not disturbing the body will prevent some smell. If the conditions are right bodies will dry out if there is plenty of dry heat.

The hotel probably has powerful deodorants to mask the smells hotel rooms pick up. They probably drowned the room in the stuff.

At one of the jobs I worked, there was an opossum that crawled into the wall and died. We chased it under a table and thought it ran out the door. It got stuck in the wall and died. It mummified in like a year. When opened the wall up there it was. There was no stink or anything. If we knew it was there we would have opened that wall up for it to get out.

Dan S.: I watched one of those autopsy shows HBO use to do. A guy stuffed a woman in a 55 gallon barrel full of tiny plastic pellets. That was enough to hide the smell of decomposition.

Dan S.: @ Amanda A. Hudson – People go missing all the time. If know one knows the person is gone they never are reported as being missing. Transiants, junkies, hookers, the shut ins rarely have people report them as missing who they disappear.

If you are reported as missing and no one finds your body right away, it might take a few years for the remains to turn up. Usually found by accident and rarely found by search parties or law enforcement.

Christopher M.: Total hoax. I could tell by the way the story was written, so I googled it.

Body Found Hoax: ‘Under Motel Bed, Police Say It Has Been There At Least 5 Years’ in Mount Laurel 100% Fake:
http://www.theepochtimes.com/n3/815155-body-found-hoax-under-motel-bed-police-say-it-has-been-there-at-least-5-years-in-mount-laurel-is-fake/

Sara: Lol Dan, the first thing I thought of when I saw the title of this article was ” There’s a dead WHORE in the mattress!” Rayn

Rayn: That’s literally the very first thing that came to my mind when I saw this, earlier, too, Sara! 🙂 I heard it in Tim Roth’s voice, too!

Sara: Me, too Rayn ! Lmao!

Diana J.: Good housekeeping wot?

(note: the originally-posted article is actually satire)